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On Vox: What Corporations sometimes are like

Please indulge a short flight of fancy whereupon I delight you with a tale of Olde Giants and Vassals to the Lord.

Imagine for a moment that there are Giants that live amongst us, some small giants that are barely larger than a house and some massive giants who can step from continent to continent and their very breath alters the weather as they go.  Now imagine that these Giants crap gifts.  They excrete money and gifts.

Mmmm.

Now, to make a living people can choose to live ON the Giants.  In fact, without armies of people on the Giants to tend to their health and protect them from other Giants, our Giants would actually die.  As long as they have their little armies though, they keep on living, immortal and fairly unaware of anyone but other Giants, their armies (whom they sometimes swipe off to assuage their vanity) and their food.  They stride from place to place pooping out prizes and eating whatever strikes their fancy. 

The Kings of the Lands realize that they can't fight the Giants, but can employ Giants to fight on their behalf.  Whole human armies are supplied by the poop of a given Giant and it's own army of helpers.  Some Giants employ smaller Giants to act on their behalf, but most Giants exist by eating stuff they find lying around or other Giants. 

The Vassals all need to live off of the crap the Giants poop out, because the Lords and Kings have all given the Giants free reign to roam over the lands and people as long as they keep crapping out prizes for the ones that aren't crushed or eaten. 

So Vassals and Lords alike are held in thrall by Immortal Giants who crap prizes and eat up all the land.  Too bad.

Originally posted on nitemayr.vox.com

Published inPersonal