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The New BSG sucked, and you know it

After the new BSG (Battle Star Galactica) premiered all the hardcore Nerds I worked with proceeded to lather themselves up in a frenzy over how awesome it was.  I was passingly familiar with the “Original Flavor”  BSG from the 70s and the two things that were acceptable about that (three if you count Lorne Green)  where the Cyon Space Fighters (the toys were great) and the Bear-Dog-Cyborg Daggit.  I Confirmed it was called Daggit using IMDB which has actual editors and not Wikipedia because even I’ve altered the basic facts about a real person and they stayed in place for weeks.  No, I don’t think Strom Thurmon led the First Autogyro Kamikazi squad, but for a while there his Wiki said so [No it didn’t I’m not about to to own up to the actual edit I made, what would be the fun in that?] Anyway, I was familiar with the Magic Underwear angle on the original and decided to avoid the “new one” because I figured that it would end up being some form of Religious Propaganda. If I wanted to watch a show about people on the run from Robotic Religious Zealots, I’d just finish my 700-Club/Litellest Hobo mashup video.

I watched episodes here and there (I’m not so closed-minded that I wouldn’t give it a fair shake)  and felt fairly justified in my “Oh Gee it’s the God Bots versus the Sinner Fleshbags”  opinion.  With all the Greek allusions they at least tried to make it not all about the big Granite Temple, but in the end the new BSG was all about the Magic Underpants and while I was correct; I wish I hadn’t been.  Because when you take the eschatology out of it, the New BSG could have been an alright SF series; the actual actio sequences were fairly good and the Characters were at least, oh hell I can’t even lie that I liked it.  It was crap from top to bottom and filmed by an insane 8 year old with a machine and switched focus  fetish.

The Jumpy camera work and “fun the first time, but crappy forever” blurry and or shaky over the shoulder camera work were just the signature moves of the “we have no content” writers and producers of this show.

The thin characters, the Deus Ex Machina writing.  Why did anyone like this crap?   It came so highly recommended I can only posit that there was some form of addictive substance in the initial broadcasts, and like “Extra Tasty Crispy” formula, people were hooked.

You now what? I could really go for some KFC now.

Published inEntertainmentReviewsTV