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Category: Personal

Man or Metro-man

Published by NiteMayr on August 5, 2008

Man or Metro-man, originally uploaded by NiteMayr.

I dunno, this might be offensive to you; but I enjoy a bit of troublemaking when I’m out and about. Adria, Anita, Chris, Shawn, Alex and Rosie will tell you that I’m the friend that will draw on your metaphorical face when you’re sleeping. It’s all about the “naughty” japes, no hits. You know?

This guy (who I will call English MotherLover from now on) was at the Party after the Shirt Tail Parade on Sunday night; and we saw him sashaying around the party as we were getting our own boogie on. Eventually someone said to me, “what do you think gay, straight or metrosexual?” and gestured to English MotherLover here. We debated this one for a while, because he was really flexing the pink and was “way too good looking and comfortable” to be straight.

Faster than you could say, How Rude, I went over to get the 411 on the situation. He assured me that he was straighter than your ruler, I asked about the tattoo. Apparently he has his friend’s Mothers name on his arms. He said that his friend was going to kick his ass for it; but he didn’t care. (It was airbrushed on anyway)

It was way too loud for a long conversation about this whole deal; and so I asked for his picture and returned to dutifully report on the details. Not Really gay, but just English (I was a great deal more colorful here but why ruin a good story).

The point of this little narrative is to reinforce a couple of points, why be shy and why not know the answer for sure? We were wondering, we had all considered the facts, but were not close to an answer, for the most part when dude’s were playing the fey at the party they were obviously straight guys playing it for kicks, this dude looked like he might really be “the only gay at that part of the crowd” and we had debated it. The truth was WAY more interesting than holding onto our little theories. People are awesome and their stories are always better than your fiction, you know?

As with everyone else I snatched for a photo on Sunday, thanks for posing English MotherLover!

Review: Graceling

Published by NiteMayr on July 31, 2008

Graceling

Gracelings are people gifted with abilities far above what anyone could call a talent. Katsa is gifted with the ability to run faster, strike harder and kill anyone better than anyone who has ever lived.

Graceling is the author Kristen Cashore’s first novel. It recounts the story of Katsa; a gifted killer in the employ of a King. Far beyond the norm for a girl; Katsa can run for hours, see in the dark and kill wild lions with her bare hands. She is dispatched to maim or terrify those that displease King Randa, to whom she owes total loyalty and fealty. Her secret rebellion against this world is discovered by another gifted fighter and Katsa joins him on a quest to learn the secret behind a royal kidnapping.

My rating: 4.5 stars
****1/2

For a first novel, this is certainly an excellent first impression; I shared the first chapter with my Daughter as I read it and she was so intrigued that she demanded that I read it to her in its entirety when I was finished with my review.  Graceling is exciting in places, contemplative in others and gorgeous in others.

The “Graced” inhabit a world that loves and fears them; save those that live free on an island kingdom removed from the politics of the mainland.  They are vetted and employed by kings and queens for their skills and live (for the most part) at the whim of others.  I couldn’t help but find a number of parallels between Graceling and 1602 (by Neil Gaiman) where the “Graced” are simple analogs to the Mutant heroes that populate comics (X-Men for example) but set in a Fantasy world. This is not a critical point however; it makes the characters somewhat familiar, not off-putting.

As for the characters themselves, we have the Mysterious Stranger/Love Interest, The Punk Nerd/Best Friend, The Older Man/Trainer, The Mother Analogue, the Overbearing Father and even the “wise ass little sister”.  Again; these are familiar archtypes that I encourage you to discover in the story for yourself, especially the spurned suitor.  Being a Young-Adult novel, complex characterizations aren’t what one would expect.

In the quiet moments, when the characters are just existing and no plot movement is going on we are treated to characters as people instead of archetypes and the author gives us people to sympathize with rather than thin action/adventure caricatures. The Quiet moments inevitably happen during some period of travel, which are as numerous as those in the Lord of the Rings; one could imagine the characters passing a pair of hairy-footed little people and having them curse under their breath “horses, why didn’t we think of horses?”

However; all of the characters save Po and Raffi seem to be dim, waiting on the Graced girl to do their thinking for them, Oll who is the spymaster for a King always seems to be one step behind Katsa.  Katsa may be a skilled fighter, but Raffi (and others) all remarked that she was not the most perceptive of people; but she has built a grand enterprise around her.  This uneven storytelling was off putting at points. Right there on page 183 Po calls out (in so many words) that the council proves that Katsa is much more intelligent than she gives herself credit for, which only enforces my concern with the storytelling regarding Katsa’s character.  We’re constantly given these adolescent characters who are not sure of themselves, but able to draw to themselves these crowds of followers.  Can’t we have a confident character who is also a protagonist?  The self-assured are usually villains and supporting characters, can’t we have a self-assured hero who is legitimate?

It is an old world we are given, with people of fantastic gifts who have become a part of every day life.  The extraordinary made tame if not banal.  Which, I suppose is what would happen; given the circumstances of the story.  People of great ability but limited means used as tools to an end; not quite slavery but not freedom either.  Po represents the departure from that form; his circumstances being exceptional in the world we are presented with.

As for the actual story?  By the later chapters I found myself willing the Author to forgo the very things that made the narriative so compelling, skip the traveling parts I would will the words to just vanish. It’s a well-paced, engaging piece of fantasy.  The characters, while thin at points, are still strong enough to make you want to follow them on.  I sussed the majority of the story early on (it’s a young adult fantasy, how complex do you want it to be) but I wasn’t bored, which is a great accomplishment.  I don’t need a surprise twist to enhance a story, I just need a strong narrative and characters that I enjoy spending my time on.  Graceling provides us with a semi-familiar fantasy setting with a rounded history and believable world that one could easily have loved as a teenager and thought back fondly on as an adult.

This is a review for mini book expo if you a Canadian blogger intereseted in reviewing books on your blog, please do not hesitate to visit.

Magic Free Pizza

Published by NiteMayr on July 23, 2008

I’m a big fan of Papa John’s Pizza.  I would buy from Papa John’s over any other chain today; if one opened here in London I would be first in line to buy a large pie.  No Joke.  I’m a fattie; but I can’t pass up a nice ‘za from Papa John’s.  When we would order pizza at the office, I would ALWAYS order from Papa John’s (if only for the cheap price and fairly prompt service).I looked through my flickr stream and was actually suprised that I did not find a single picture with Papa John’s Pizza boxes in it.

That being said, I’m fairly sure there are a couple in there; I just didn’t tag them correctly.

This post; however; is all about free pizza.

We ordered from Papa johns about once or twice a month at home; and only had to complain about the service we received once.  We called and complained that we had waited over an hour for the pizza and found that the order hadn’t been filled at all (despite an email confirmation being delivered to me).  I wasn’t upset; the pizza eventually arrived and I was happy to eat it over “House”.  Papa John’s wasn’t happy though; they started sending me free Pizzas.

I got my first pizza coupon the very next week.  We got a large Pepperoni on that one.  It arrived on time and we had no problems.

The next one came two weeks after the next Pizzas we orderd from Papa Johns.  We hadn’t complained.  Why did we get a free pizza coupon?  Never one to look a gift horse in the mouth, we had a nice pizza dinner and tought nothing of it.

Then another free pizza coupon arrived a couple weeks later.

At this point I thought I was getting a customer loyalty bonus and just accepted that every time I ordered pizza from Papa John’s, I’d get another one free.

“Papa John’s Pizza, DESPERATE for YOUR LOVE“

It’s been well over a year since I was last able to scarf down a slice from the PJ’s and I kind of miss them.  I wonder if they miss me back?

Ghoulish Disapointment and Why I can't tell you about it

Published by NiteMayr on July 21, 2008

Zombies

I was excited for months about the prospect of a Zombie Walk here in London this past weekend, but as the day came closed it became clear that the whole thing was some kid’s idea and not anything serious.  Not that Zombie dress-up needs to be serious, but it didn’t seem to have anything behind it save a desire to get out on the weekend.  No permits no organization not even a flash mob kind of thing, just some kids.

Oh well.  It was called off at the last minute (as far as I know) maybe there will be one in the fall.

Twitter

I finally appear to have contracted the same twitter disorder as Joel Johnson, where my twitter kinda-sorta works.  I guess I’ll reserve complaint (as it IS free) but SweetCron can’t come quicker, really.

Fought Super-Spies in my Sleep

Published by NiteMayr on July 16, 2008

I write about my dreams here in the blog every once in a while, so I don’t feel too exposed when I say that last night I dreamed I was a super-powered spy.  I had a watch that could be used to select from a series of super abilities (like a super powered jump or super strength) and a goofy robot companion.

In the part of the dream I clearly remember, my team leader was drawing out a super-spy villainess out of her bunker so that we could apprehend her.  In true comedy action fashion, our goofy robot sidekick popped up and tipped her off, so she took off using her own super powers, while we gave chase.  I rounded a corner, (using super jumping to catch up) and found her standing over the bodies of my team mates, laughing at me.  I lunged at her and as I did woke up to find I was lunging at my wife in my sleep and apparently about to do her harm as I grabbed her.  She said “Hey!” and shook me off and I woke up, feeling sheepish.

It was quite a wake up.

These are Both Pints

Published by NiteMayr on July 13, 2008

These are Both Pints, originally uploaded by NiteMayr.

I have forgotten the brand name of the massive German Wheat Beer I was drinking, but it was drinking from a child’s bucket. The other Glass is Harp in a Labatt glass.

I found it out the giant pint is a Hoegaarden White Ale

This was alot more beer than I had expected or wanted with my meal, but it was VERY good. It was draft, cold and refreshing. I think it’d be nicer with wings.

My Friend ruined "The Big Toy"

Published by NiteMayr on July 10, 2008

This used to be my playground

The liability panic is adult nuttiness except when it’s not. It’s a fairly raw issue in Greenwich, where, for instance, a doctor was awarded $6.3 million a few years back when he broke his leg in two places while sledding with his 4-year-old son.

Build a Wiffle Ball Field and Lawyers Will Come

My friend Bryan Solgoode ruined the Big Toy for us all.

It feels good to say it out loud.

He was my friend and all, but only after the fact.  He wasn’t my friend when he did it.  It was his fault though, or more correctly, it was his mother’s fault for raising him as a crybaby.  Bryan could probably crush your dreams of fatherhood with a stern look these days, but when he was young you could bring him to tears with a strong word.  Thus Bryan destroyed the fun of childhood by being a giant slobbering wimp.

In the picture linked to this story, you see an open, vacant lot where a gigantic three tier, rope bridged behemoth of awesome once stood.  It had swings, and ladders and sand and tire swings and a tower.  Three stories tall!  An amazing “Big Toy” by any accounting.  I wish I had a picture of it to show you, but the fun police tore it down after Bryan “Big Baby” Solgoode fell off of it and hurt himself (through his own misadventure).

This was one of those Big Toys that would be called an attractive nuisance these days and be shut down so as to avoid lawsuits from crazed parents.  I mean, they didn’t even have to pay for medical bills, he didn’t die!  Years later, when involved in fights that cost a kid the use of his kidneys, Bryan didn’t have his legs cut off, did he? Nope, but because Bryan fell off of the biggest and best big toy in Kincardine, we all lose out.  We keep losing out when something cool or fun is closed to avoid lawsuits.

Where does it all end?

Note:  Bryan Solgoode is not his name, I changed it, for FEAR OF BEING SUED.

Hey Joe! What you doin' with my garbage?

Published by NiteMayr on July 8, 2008

I forgot what day it was last night, and put my garbage out on the curb.  My big, 2 weeks old garbage bag.  Full of chicken.

Get the picture?

Be glad I didn’t take one, it was a disaster.

What is it about garbage that attracts the animals?  Is it the rotting meat?  Ewww!

Jen ended up having to re-bag a bunch of garbage, fighting clouds of flies and beating a raccoon to death no doubt, since I was at work already.

I’m firmly in the “I wish we had bag tags so that I could put out extra garbage” camp.  I still don’t have recycling containers and so have tons of garbage that needs to be dealt with and last week I ended up having to store garbage in the garage as we had too many bags out.  If I could have paid to put out more bags, I would have.

Anyone in the London area know where I can buy recycling containers?

NiteMayr’s helpful advice on raccoon fighting:

Raccoon combat is never pretty, it always seems to involve low blows and insults about one’s mother. I will usually just toss some cat food off to the side and insult their love of “pussy food”.  Yes, it’s a low blow, but it puts them off-balance for the final “yo mama’s so furry that she has an entire page on Encyclopedia Dramatica” which sends them into a shame spiral.  It’s troubling that even racoons are familiar with ED, but that’s the viral nature of the ‘net for you!

–Nitemayr “Raccoon Combat”