Henry, age 6

Kelly: What is on your shoulder?
Henry: Oh, I didn’t rub the cream in enough.
Kelly: What cream?
Henry: This stuff.
Kelly: That’s hair conditioner. Did you put it everywhere?
Henry: Just from my neck to my belly button and my arms. It smelled so good I couldn’t resist.
Salinger: What does it feel like?
Henry: Tight, dawg.
Salinger: Shut up, you aren’t Randy Jackson.