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Holy Crap, we nearly rolled!

On the Road Again!

On Vox: Superbad and Goodbye

Last night John, Jeff, Damon, Ben, Nathan, Karl, Alex and I went to see Superbad at the local Regal Stadium Theater; and I think we all laughed ourselves stupid.

Somewhere around the giant penis riding the bomb a la slim pickins we were all subnormal, and happy to be there.

All in all, I want to avoid saying too much about Superbad; other than to endorse its repeated viewing with all of your friends and its purchase in multiple formats.  Look, if they come out with a shrinkydinks related Superbad merch pack, I think you might want to buy it.

We all agreed that the DVD release of this movie will be an instant must-buy and I think we all made a silent pact to purchase it via advanced ordering.

The whole theater was engulfed in laughs during this one and to address the “misogynistic” claims made against it, what did teenage girls talk about at that age, huh?

Last night I also said G’bye to Gooddamon as he won’t be back at the office this week, so Bye, see you on the internets.

Originally posted on nitemayr.vox.com

On Vox: Huh, Amazing Lists!

Digg "Entertainment" has really degraded over the past couple of weeks into Digg "Pop Culture Lists"

Check it out

Here are the top stories as I write this:


  1. The 10 Most Awesome Movies Hollywood Ever Killed


  2. The 50 Hottest Women in Music


  3. YouTube wants to depose Stephen Colbert, Jon Stewart


  4. The 25 Most Notable Celebrity Quotes of the Past 25 Years


  5. Can't earn enough from CD sales? Sell live concert recordings on USB sticks


  6. The Top 10 Scenes From The Office

See what I mean?  4 out of six, lists.

I like lists, and enjoy them for entertainment, but this is getting beyond the joke.  Essentially "Entertainment News" is supplanted by "Pop Culture Nerd Opinion"  which is pretty much pointless. 

I like pop culture, I like debating it and its merits.  We pretty much run on Pop culture trivia over here and it is part of our common lexicon and cultural chorus; but please for the love of mike, Digg, let's digg something other than lists, kay?

Originally posted on nitemayr.vox.com

On Vox: Stardust: A Movie with Flamboyant Pirates.

I had initially titled this post “Stardust:   A Movie with Gay Flamboyant Pirates.” but there is no strike through for the title, which is a small allegory for the film itself.

It was funny; yes.

I enjoyed it, most certainly.

Was it Lame?  Nope.

Did it lack?

Yes.

As per usual with anything “Non Sandman” that Neil Gaiman writes, the whole thing telegraphs itself and just meanders to the obvious conclusion, with no real conflict or worry.  You know how it is going to end from the first knowing wink in the first act.

What saves this flick from my “bad” books is that I simply didn’t care that I knew how it was going to end.  I was constantly amused by the unexpected cameos and characters, as well as the VERY dark humor that abounded through it.  Not to mention the best Pirate character we have seen in a while.  I won’t give it away, but this role was played to better effect by the actual actor than the actor being aped (Robin Williams).  Bravo for the casting choice.

Claire Danes plays an annoying brat who learns to stop being annoying and love the man who found her just a few days ago and clapper her in magic chains, what’s not to love about magical bondage games?  Who wouldn’t want a few rounds with Miss Danes, if only to stop her from pouting (yet again) through yet another role.  For those of you not familiar with her past role in “My So-Called Life” I’ll sum up the entire series in one sentence:  the hot but not too hot and not too bright girl you knew in high school never did get her head together, but was constantly upset at her inability to get it together. 

I lost the thread a bit there; um.  Oh Yes.

The fights are quite good, well choreographed, especially the one with the Zombie.  For frequent readers, you might be aware of my affection for the recently dead and now animate.  This is more of a voodoo deal, so it;s not to my taste.  That being said, the fight itself is fantastic. 

I’m going to go out on a limb and recommend this film to my action film friends as well as my “movie movie” friends as I enjoyed the humor so much, I imagine they will too.

Originally posted on nitemayr.vox.com

Bones of Baghdad Part One (Revised in Place)

“The fact of the matter on the ground was that American Soldiers were taking up arms with the Insurgents”

In an after-action report; a buck sergeant broke from reading the report to a gaggle of second and third stringers.  Some of them woke from their stupor when his candor changed.  A DoD official ran from the other side of the conference room and flicked off his mike and hissed, “shut the fuck up, asshole”

Sgt. Morris was used to the interference from the suits at DoD; especially when someone said something that made any battle seem like there was less than total victory on the part of the US forces, but he had never heard one of the flacks curse before, especially in the presence of a room full of reporters.  He pushed back from the table, stood up and began to walk from the room, ignoring the questions from the reporters, who awoke far too late.

The Flack, Marist Johnson (Masters in Business Administration) followed, “Private More-Ris,” he drawled. “Priv-eht More-rr-iss” he drew it out.  This was how they threatened you in the DoD. “You will stop and listen to me when ah address yew.”

Sgt. Morris turned and faced the shorter, flustered man and stared deeply into his eyes. “Yes?”

Marist stopped and smoothed his suit, “as I uh, was saying.  You can’t tell the press that American boys and girls are fighting other Americans.  How would that look on the news?”

“Frankly, sir, I don’t care how it looks, not after today.  This is just the latest fuck-fest in a long line of them in haji-land”  Sgt. Morris wanted very much for the Dod flack to simply burst into flames and leave him to return to his duty, but Marist pressed the issue.

“Look Priv-eht More-iss, I know you don’t like lah-ing to the press, but we have to maintain the appearance that we are winning this wo-ah” 

Marist sniffed and turned back towards the conference room, Morris stalked into the HQ ready room and sat at his Desk, waiting for the next round of reports to come in from the walls of the Emerald City.

The room was protected by a coterie of young solders with bright new XM8 carbides, all looking hot and bored.  These new recruits were the highest scoring marksmen in their given class, which wasn’t saying much as standards always seemed to find a new low in Sgt. Morris’s eyes.   He looked over the computer screen on his Public network terminal, watching for his words to show up in the news wires.  They didn’t; the DoD had already smoothed them out of the actual record.    Instead the after-action report contained no information about the actual fight that had happened that morning, and instead spoke about how reliable the power was in American Controlled Baghdad.

That control extended to the borders of the Green Zone and no further.  Outside the concrete walls of the Green Zone, Baghdad was in chaos and no one new about it save the people in the Green Zone itself.

A major contributor to that Chaos was the fact that not a single American Soldier had left the confines of the Green Zone or the Baghdad Militarized AirZone in a month.  After US civilian and military casualties had hit the 4 digits in two days, the Brass decided to consolidate their forces in the only fully protected zones of Iraq and simply wait out the ensuing carnage.  All the while; the DoD would put out stories of reduced troop deployments as a sign of Americas impending victory in the desert.

Sgt. Morris called over a one of the numerous DoD functionaries that inhabited the offices and handed her a card with a stern request that she hand-deliver it to the CiC liaisons at the top floor of the central HQ, with an even sterner warning that the contents were eyes-only for the CiC liaison’s office.

She nodded curtly and hurried off to the elevator stack.

Morris sighed and resumed reading the wires, hoping that some detail about what was really going on in Iraq was going to show up.  Nothing.  He compiled another report on his findings and passed it along in the closed network to his CO and retired to the barracks.

Despite the ongoing carnage outside the walls of the Emerald City, the streets within were full of unconcerned shoppers, diplomats and Iraqi wealthy.  While the fighting was pitched and frantic outside, it had been weeks since a rocket or mortar had been seen in the Green Zone.  The Insurgents were more focused on hand-to-hand battles in the streets than they were about getting at the Americans.  Some American soldiers and contractors had even given up and simply joined the battle, if the after-action reports were to be believed.

Even now, in the waning evening, the sounds of conflict and wailing of the dying could be heard.  Most of the people in the Green Zone slept with ear plugs just to block them out.

Sgt. Morris found he could only sleep when he was listening to old podcasts from the middle of the War, when they were still wrong about Iraq and the Army was actually getting somewhere.

As he drifted off, he thought he could hear the guns outside drift off, in the Doppler of drowsiness they just faded into nothing and he was gone.

On Vox: Missing: One Tubby Blogger

Hey Blog, sorry I’ve been away so much.

I finished “Choke” today, let me confide in you that I had to read it in small doses, as I only seemed to find time to read it on the can.  I took it out this afternoon and finished it.  I think Karl will like it.

Let me also confide in you that I am very afraid that I will have to leave even more stuff behind.  I’m going to visit U-Haul to find out if I can actually tow one of their trailers (I have a U-Haul hitch on the car already, so I may be all set)

I’ve been on the Facebook alot lately, so sorry for that.

We sold some furniture this week, which is bittersweet as we only made 75 bucks.  I need to make up about 800 bucks in cash to pay off all of our immediate debts, so that I don’t have to rely on credit.

Someone would tell me that I should save my pennies now, but I get out so little, that the times I do go out and spend, I like to enjoy myself.  I should get out with the Camera more though,  tomorrow.   I mean, I’ll have a new lens by then; I’ll HAVE to go out.  My new flash arrive next week, so does my new camera bag.

I am spending this money now to round out my kit more before I am on the other side of the border; where my purchase power will be reduced.

I’m very uncertain about this move, as I am giving up so much for it.  Maybe I’ll be able to snag that trailer and relieve some of the worry.  We’ll see.

I’m not hitching my star to it yet.

Originally posted on nitemayr.vox.com