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Tag: kids

Extra Short Story: The Growing Season

After a good rainstorm, Alisha loved to go out and tour from puddle to puddle in her bare feet, feeling warm water and cool mud squashing around her toes as she splashed the water here and there.  The humid air of a summer storm hanging around her, the heat clinging to the day like a comforting hug.  Alisha sometimes just sat at the edge of really big puddles and hung her feet in them, poking one foot then the other out of the water, all brown and dirty with mud.

After a June full of rain, the grass and dirt were almost always soaked, so Alisha was sitting on a concrete curb and letting warm gutter runoff sluice over her feet when her daddy came home from work that night.

I asked my dad, who knows everything

On George Carlin:

Hes average, personally i like Chris Rock, Eddy Murphy and Russel Peters most. Never heard of him until he died and i even asked my dad, who knows most bigger comedians and he had never heard of him.

Feel free to link me to some of his good stuff, his 7 swearwords stuff was pretty…. average.

Nobbeh – who is level 44

I know my Dad, he knows football (the good kind), nuclear maintainence, 60s and 70s rock and pop, safety regulations, union politics and a bit about almost every other subject.  I wouldn’t go posting on the internet about how I asked my dad (who is not a bona fide authority on anything) about said subject.  I might say that I looked around some comedy blogs or science manuals or whatever, but not “I asked Dad, he says get stuffed“.

I am a Dad too.  I pretend to know everything sometimes too.  However, I like to think that I’ll admit when I’m stumped.  I don’t want my kids or neices and nephews to think they can use me as an authority on anything save what I’m an expert on, and even then I’d like to think they’d lie and use a euphamism like “I asked a professional asshole, and he says you’re part of the club” or “I know an expert in social dissasspointment, he says that if you sucked any more at being in relationships you’d be looking to on Henry the 8th memoirs for advice”

Or something like that.

The Guardian Gave me an Idea

The Guardian gave me an idea, they played some classic rock for some under 8s and asked them what they thought, here are some choice quotes:

“Substitue” – The Who

  • Beth Ugh. I was born with Plasticine in my mouth?
  • Holly It sounds like when your wee goes back up.
  • My own Daughter: This makes me feel bad

    “Touch Me” – The Doors

  • Gabrielle It’s too pointy.
    i don’t have this one on hand, so I can’t tell you how My Own liked it

    “Sunshine of your Love” – Cream

  • Gabrielle Argh! Vampires!
    i don’t have this one on hand, so I can’t tell you how My Own liked it

    “Immigrant song” – Led Zepplin

  • Holly This isn’t singing, it’s just screaming.
    Beth It’s kind of eeeevol. I’m going to watch Lord Of The Rings Three next week.
    Holly No you’re not.
    Beth Am.
    Holly Not.
  • My own Daughter:I like it Dances a bit

    “Smells Like Teen Spirit” – Nirvana

  • Sophie It’s making me think about doing bad things like putting snowballs down my sister’s back.
  • My own Daughter: this makes me feel Mad. This is a boy song.

    “Crosstown Traffic” – Jimi Hendrix

  • Gabrielle It’s making me feel all dizzy. Can I have some juice?

    Read the rest of the Article for more fun!

    Here are a few of my own, with my Daughter’s quotes:

    “How Soon is Now?” – the Smiths
    I like it, it makes me smile

    “Blue Monday” – New Order
    This is nice, I like this.

    “Pump up the Volume” – m/a/r/r/s
    This is cool

    “Behind Blue eyes” – Limp Bizkut
    “This makes me scared”